Disordered Eating Doesn’t Have a “Look”

I’ve worked with clients who have bravely said, “I struggle with binge eating/food addiction ,” only to be met with a response like, “It can’t be that bad. You don’t even look that big.” Or “You look normal and you’re beautiful don’t stress so much.”

Let’s clear this up right now. Disordered eating does not have a look.

It is not a specific body type, it is not a weight, and It is not a size.

Disirdered eating is a behavior. It’s a pattern rooted in excessive restriction, overeating, binge eating, compulsive eating, guilt, shame, emotional distress, and often survival. It has nothing to do with whether someone appears “thin,” “average,” or “overweight.”

People of all sizes struggle with disordered eating. Many are in larger bodies, but ome are in straight-sized bodies, some are athletes, some are professionals, some are moms trying to hold it all together. You cannot always diagnose an eating disorder by looking at someone and when we say things like, “You don’t look stray big,” what we’re really saying is, “Your pain doesn’t count.”

That kind of dismissal keeps people silent, it keeps them stuck and It feeds the shame that already fuels the disordered eating cycle.

The truth is this: your struggle is valid even if you don’t look the way people expect someone with an eating disorder to look. You do not have to hit a certain weight, you do not have to lose control in a certain dramatic way, and you do not have to “prove” you are suffering.

If you are obsessing over food, hiding food, restricting and then bingeing, feeling out of control, or living in a constant cycle of start-over Mondays, that is real, it is painful and that deserves support.

Disordered eating thrives in secrecy and comparison and It whispers that you’re not enough, that it’s not that bad and other people have it worse and that really the problem is that you should just have more discipline. Those thoughts are not truth, they are symptoms.

Recovery does not require you to look a certain way, it requires honesty, compassion, it requires support and you are allowed to seek that support right now.

If this resonates with you, I encourage you to take the next step toward food sobriety. You don’t have to keep minimizing your struggle, you don’t have to wait until it “gets worse.” Your healing matters exactly as it is today.